Navigating Grief this Holiday Season
This post was originally published on November 18, 2023
The holiday season is often portrayed as a time of joy, warmth, and togetherness. However, if you're grappling with the loss of a loved one, or the loss of an important relationship or friendship, these festivities can feel like an emotional minefield. Grieving during the holidays is uniquely challenging, and it's important to recognize that your journey is your own. With thoughtful strategies that prioritize your mental well-being, you can navigate this period with grace and resilience.
Understanding Your Grief:
Grief is a personal and intricate journey, and it's okay to feel a range of emotions during the holidays. It’s normal! There is no "right" way to mourn, and it's crucial to allow yourself the space to express your feelings. We often think of grief in relation to the death of a loved one, but we grieve all sorts of things! A mother that never showed up the way you needed them to, a partner who walked away, a friendship that ended abruptly, the loss of a career or dream. We want to make it clear here that grief encompasses a plethora of painful experiences. Regardless of the circumstance, whether it's sadness, anger, or fleeting moments of joy, honouring your emotions is a vital part of your healing process. From a mental health perspective, acknowledging and accepting these emotions will contribute to a healthier grieving process, especially through the holidays which are statistically a very difficult time for folks with loss.
Strategies to help you navigate this holiday season:
Honour Your Feelings: Your feelings are valid(+++!), and it's okay to experience the holidays with a mix of emotions. Don't suppress them; instead, create a safe space to acknowledge and express what you're going through. Recognizing and validating your emotions is an essential aspect of maintaining good mental health.
Adjusting Traditions: If traditional holiday activities feel too overwhelming, consider adjusting or creating new traditions that align with your current emotional state. This is your journey, and adapting celebrations to suit your needs can be a powerful way to make the holidays more manageable. From a mental health perspective, this flexibility is crucial in reducing stress and promoting emotional well-being. This can be difficult for those of us who seek to please our friends and family, or keep the peace. That’s where boundaries come in handy!
Plan Ahead for Your Comfort: Identify potential triggers and plan ahead to navigate them. Whether it's a family gathering or a specific event, having a strategy in place can give you a sense of control. Your well-being comes first, so feel empowered to prioritize your comfort and adjust plans accordingly. Planning for potential stressors is an important element of maintaining mental resilience.
Create Your Support System: Reach out to friends, family, or even a grief support group who understand and respect your unique experience. Communicate your needs openly and let them be there for you, because you are a good person who deserves support and care. Your support system is a crucial part of your journey, providing comfort and companionship during challenging times. From a mental health perspective, human connection is a powerful antidote to feelings of isolation.
Prioritize Your Self-Care: Take care of yourself physically and emotionally. Ensure you're getting enough rest, maintaining a healthy diet, and engaging in activities that bring you comfort. Self-care is not a luxury; it's a necessity during a time when stress levels are heightened. From a mental health perspective, self-care is integral to maintaining emotional balance and resilience.
Seek Support on Your Terms: If needed, consider seeking professional support tailored to your unique situation. Therapists and counselors can provide guidance and coping strategies to help you navigate this challenging time. Seeking support is a courageous step toward managing your grief, and from a mental health perspective, it can be an invaluable resource in promoting emotional well-being.
Navigating grief, particularly during the holidays, is your own unique personal journey, and it's okay to prioritize your emotions and mental well-being. By honouring your feelings, adjusting traditions, planning for your comfort, creating a support system, practicing self-care and seeking support on your terms, you can find a path to healing. The holidays may never be the same, but with time and personalized support, they can become a time of reflection, growth, and a celebration of the enduring love you shared with the person you grieve. Prioritizing your mental health in this process is a crucial aspect of building resilience and finding peace.
Kristen Hamilton-Block works with youth and adults struggling with depression, anxiety , trauma and relationship issues that are a result of any form of trauma. She uses an AEDP and Emotion-Focused lens to explore our emotions in order to improve self-worth, relationships and overall quality of life. In her free time, Kristen can be found trying out a new recipe, reading a good thriller or spending time with friends and family.